Martha Moment

Today I stayed home with a sick child, a perfect opportunity to get a jump-start on my home to-do list.

Mostly we curled up and read Voyage of the Dawn Treader together.

Oh, yeah, I did about 80 loads of laundry. That should count for something, right?

I'm taking about two weeks off when this sub job ends before going back on the regular rotation.

The project plans have been piling up in my head.

Here's a partial look at my list:
1. Walking 3-4 miles a day instead of my more-typical two.
2. Spending lots of meaningful time preparing for Sunday School and an upcoming talk at our church.
3. Clean my house.
4. Get in some thrifting, preferably at a larger Goodwill in a nearby town.
5. Paint both bathrooms.
6. Repair my closet, which COLLAPSED last weekend. I might share before pictures, but it will would leave you scarred for life.
7. Write letters.
8. Catch up on the girls' scrapbooks.

Now I'm out of breath.

My husband would very much like the closet repair in progress, but his version of the next few weeks is probably lots more accurate than mine.

"Why don't you sleep late and blog and read a book for a few days?" he asked me.

Bless that man. After nearly 16 years, he knows I need to detox after big events.

Remember my "10 Goals for 2010" ? (I've considered a follow-up post to assess how I'm doing. I decided against it.) Anyway, my word for the year was "grateful", but now I'm thinking of a second choice.

Not that being grateful has paled in comparison. It hasn't, and indeed, it is arguably a large part of what this second word entails.

The new word is REST.

As a professed perfectionist, I am scared of resting. I have, on many occasions, been paralyzed into inactivity by my unrealistic goals, but fear, not peace, stopped me.

A few weeks ago, I was lamenting to my precious mentor about some decisions facing our family. "Does all this make sense?" I asked her.
She smiled and took my hand.
"Yes, Martha, it does."

She nailed me.
I realized then that all those perfectionist tendencies that I thought I'd left behind were creeping back into my thoughts, only in different packages, tied up in a spiritualized bow.

Ouch.

I still don't have my questions answered. In fact, all signs point to things getting more complicated, not less. I haven't a clue what to do.

Except for one thing.

I need to rest.

Matthew 11:28 (The Message)

^28-30"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Blessings,
Ginger